Marriage…problems…Divorce!

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The relatively high divorce rates over past few decades have compelled us to think and analyze the reasons that lead to such an outcome in any family. Family problems come very close to the basic problems of human nature. There are always issues of personal loyalty, betrayal, anger, revenge, misunderstandings, self-esteem, ego, education, achievements and monetary matters. The reasons for which couples seek divorce most of the time, is very frivolous. The cosmopolitan and stressful lifestyle is also one of the major contributing factors in family breakdowns. In most cases, couples are at loggerheads for quite some time and a small argument gives an outlet to their simmering tension that may lead to domestic violence and then finally to divorce.

Divorce – what does this lead to? Is it just a separation of two lives living together? Is it just a feeling of independence? Is it just bitter memories left behind? No – it’s much more than that; it’s a complete breakdown of a family!

child custodyBy family, I just don’t mean a husband and a wife, who could not work out there marriage. By family, I mean the children too, who become the main reason for the unending litigation and trials. From there starts the fight for custody, access, support and so on.

Custody is the right to make the important decisions about the care and upbringing of a child including the decisions regarding child’s health, religion, and education. It also includes the physical care and control of the child. Access is the right to spend time with the child and the child’s right to spend time with that parent. Normally, when one parent has custody, the other parent has the access. Access also includes the right to ask for and be given information about the child’s welfare, health and education. Parents have an obligation to support their children in accordance with their respective financial abilities, which constitutes of child support.

When parents do not live together, they must arrange how they will share their parenting rights and responsibilities. In those circumstances, things can be sorted out with mutual consent and by executing a separation agreement that can define the terms for child custody, access and support along with many other concerns between the spouses. A thoughtful and planned handling of the problem with professional guidance can prevent bitter experiences, unwanted outcomes and better future for the children.

Circumstances leading to contested matters and legal issues of child custody, access and support with or without equalization of property between the spouses are serious matters and should be seriously dealt with. The Court Orders pertaining to these issues may not only change the present as well as future plans and the decisions of spouses, but also the lives of the children. The right or the wrong decision shapes the future of the child accordingly.

Sometimes, the circumstances are so genuine that the divorce is the only and the ultimate solution to all the problems.  But please do think twice before taking any decision…is it really the ultimate solution?

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